Part 3 of our series Find Your Happy Home and Happy Life! As the Lou Lou Girls, we could not be more different.
Hi! Amber here. Our whole goal on the Lou Lou Girls’ blog is to help you create a happy home. There are four of us Lou Lou Girls, each at different ages and stages of creating a happy home, so we hope through this series you can relate, learn, and share with us in our quest for a happy home.
The number one thing that’s been on my mind lately for creating a happy home is actually me. Ever heard the sayings, “when mom’s happy, everyone’s happy” or “happy wife, happy life” ? Well for the past few months, a happy mom was an issue. I’d been moody, annoyed, and down right unhappy around my family. I was pretty sure I could chalk up 75% of it to post-partum issues, but once my hormones worked themselves out I still was left with constant feelings of unhappiness.
I wasn’t necessarily depressed, but after hours of listening to me my husband (careful not to be trying to “fix it”) pointed out that I wasn’t owning my happiness. I was focusing all my efforts on things I couldn’t control, and therefore was feeling empty, inadequate, and unhappy when things didn’t work out.
I realized that I was feeling super inadequate about being a mother and a homemaker. After my husband helped me realize that I didn’t have to focus on my weaknesses (aka. decorating skills, cleaning skills, cooking skills, patience) I started to focus on my strengths (organizing, researching, determination, etc.)
I realized that instead of wasting my time beating myself up over my lack of skill, I could instead enjoy getting organized and researching to improve my skill. I got a bunch of books on parenting, I wrote up a plan to keep the house in functioning order, and I have a plan to start building my cooking skills. I also made a chart to remind me how to own my happiness (which I will share tomorrow) because guess what, I’m dang good at making charts!
I no longer feel so inadequate, but instead feel determined to learn. I am happier about my situation, not because it changed, but because I have a new perspective on it. I am more hopeful and therefore more positive and patient around my family.
What have you done to help yourself feel adequate in homemaking or motherhood? I would love to hear! I’d also love to hear what you want us to share! How can we help you in your quest for a happy home?